Why it's not my problem, and other helpful hints

New rule: If someone tells you that they can't help you, accept it and go away. Really, for the good of everyone, just go home. Whining, begging and excessive explaining just pisses us off. If we could have helped you, we'd have done it just to get rid of you.

Customer: Can you fix this?
Me: No. I'm sorry, but we don't fix those.
Customer: Well what happened is...

This is wrong, and let me tell you why. We don't care what happened. It's broken and we can't fix it. Go tell your story to someone who makes more money. Like a therapist, perhaps. I can't fix it and if you don't want to accept my suggestion that you contact your manufacturer then you're pretty much out of luck. That is the end of my involvement. Also, I'm sorry if you lost your data, but telling me what it is and how important it is to you does not create the "get her data back" button that you seem to think it does. I'm not telling you that it's gone just because it's fun for me to mess with you. It's really gone, and while I can't promise that no one on earth could get it back for you, I can promise that I can't and I don't know anyone who can. It's over. Move on. If your stuff is that important to you, then you should have been more careful with it. It's a good lesson, really. Learn it and quit making it my problem.

-Jess